It's just another night, I find myself pampering myself, making sure I look presentable, and checking to see that I don't have spinach from my earlier lunch stuck in my teeth. I sit in my car and wait until it is a good time to get out to walk to the restaurant we're meeting at. Get to the restaurant, examine the menu, and text who I'm meeting that I am there and ready to meet!
Sound familiar? It is. Except instead of Tinder, Match.com, etc., I am meeting a potential new BFF thanks to "Bumble BFF". These BFF's are all women who I have "matched" with. You have to set up a profile just like any other dating app, except this is for friends.
Being in a new city and looking for a community, this is one way I have been trying to meet other mid 20 somethings who value what I value, have similar interests, and can ask good questions. What I have found funny about this whole process is that I am finding myself more nervous and concerned about what these women will possibly think of me, than I was on any date from my past.
With the most transparent profile and trying to have a sense of humor, I ask myself: Is it too much? Will people like me? Am I too cheesy? Do I sound weird?
However, I know I am not alone in this. So many women's profiles say things like "LOVE Wine Night", "The Bachelor is my favorite show", "Bottomless mimosas are where it's at" etc. So many profiles are carbon copies of each other, and while these things are all wonderful, I wonder if we're saying what we want people to hear in profiles for the likelihood of matching rather than sharing some of the coolest things about ourselves (within the character limit of course!).
I think what's so fascinating about this is that as women we are supposed to build each other up, be on each other's team, and root for one another, yet I think, these friend dates are more nerve wracking then meeting anyone from a dating app! We get so critical of ourselves and of others.
We are on this app because we are striving for connection. We're women who are new to a city, or looking for a new group of friends, or just trying to meet someone new - while judgement may occur, isn't it better to be who you really are to attract the friends you really want?
We need to set the standard and encourage each other, be our true authentic selves, and not worry about having spinach in our teeth. And if you're wondering, I've met some awesome ladies!